
The fights fly past every few minutes, with the style knob turned firmly up to 11. Wisdom is shared, blows are traded and bellies are fed, as Po learns the sacred art of kung fu. No guesses who gets picked by accident.Ĭue a series of calamitous montages, most notably an inspired sequence involving chopsticks and dumplings. When Lovejoy escapes from a heavily guarded fortress, Oogway selects the one who will become the mythical Dragon Warrior and save the day. Evil in the form of Shifu’s former pupil, snow leopard Tai Lung. These warriors bow to a bodacious, laidback turtle of the Nemo variety, Oogway. At the head of the Five is Master Shifu (Hoffman), a red panda. Po’s valley (The Valley of Peace) lives in the shadow of the Jade Palace, home to the legendary fighters of legend, the Furious Five – Viper, Crane, Tigress, Monkey and Mantis if you must know. In the freedom of the CGI realm, that’s a very good thing. You can call the character what you like, but he’s clearly been written for Jack Black.

What does he adore? “I love kung fuuuuuuuuuuu!” he shouts, tearing through the paper walls with his tenacious vocal talent.

He doesn’t have wings or a beak, and he definitely doesn’t share his pater’s passion for noodles.

Nevertheless, Po the panda (Black) is here to stay. First comes love, then comes platonic relationships, then comes a stork with a baby elephant. Ever since Dumbo, adults have hoodwinked their offspring with such biological fallacies. And so with Dreamworks’ Kung Fu Panda, we are introduced to a duck who has given birth to a panda.

Newton’s third law of motion, opposable thumbs, all of them pale in comparison to the biggest lie of all: reproduction. There’s something about animated films that lets them get away with ignoring science. Watch Kung Fu Panda online in the UK: Netflix UK / Apple TV (iTunes) / TalkTalk TV / Prime Video (Buy/Rent) / Google Play Cast: Jack Black, Dustin Hoffman, Angelina Jolie, Lucy Liu, Seth Rogen, Jackie Chan
